Why Confidence, Not Self Esteem, Leads to Success

Parenting can be tough, especially when deciding how you should instill virtues and values in your children. Read why confidence in kids, not self-esteem, leads to success and how you can help your children grow into thriving adults.

Thank you to ThinkVirtues for sponsoring this conversation about confidence in kids.

Confidence not Self-Esteem

Raising good kids who are happy, confident, and successful in life is every good parent’s intent. Without formal training or guidance, most parents raise their children in the hope that they will grow up to be more successful than them. To aid themselves in their most important job, parents seek out all kinds of advice from one end of the spectrum to the other. One study that has failed parents most is The Psychology of Self-Esteem by Dr. Nathaniel Branden published in 1969. He concluded that “self-esteem” is the single most important part of one’s persona. Between 1970-2000, 15,000 scholarly articles were written that support this notion! This ushered in a cultural change that included the rise of the self-help publishing industry as well as manifold programs designed to help everyone build their self-esteem and instill the same in their children. Fostering self esteem in every possible way was touted as the epitome of “good parenting.”

The Self-Esteem Revolution

The “self-esteem revolution” was responsible for soccer coaches who didn’t count goals but handed trophies out to everyone. Constructive criticism was replaced with broad, indiscriminate praise while honest competition was frowned upon, and a plethora of other changes based upon building self-esteem were implemented even though most didn’t make intuitive sense to many parents. Yet, logically, who could argue with all the data to support this? It is no surprise that in 2003 the Association of Psychological Science asked Dr. Roy Baumeister, proponent and great believer in positive self-esteem, to review the literature. His conclusion: high self-esteem didn’t improve grades, career advancement, or achievement. It didn’t affect the usage of alcohol and didn’t reduce violence. He later stated that this was the biggest disappointment of his career!

Competence and Confidence

It is competence and confidence that help people from the youngest to the oldest become their best selves. It is empowering and encouraging positive behavior and accomplishment through trial and error that teaches children how to go through the process that makes success possible in their lives. They have to attempt a task, fail, and then try again and again to realize that this is part of life. Parents need to empower their children to do things for themselves. ThinkVirtues is here to help you do just that! ThinkVirtues provides a comprehensive program for you and your family to help transfer your parental wisdom, knowledge, and life experiences to your children. With over 300 years of combined experience, the ThinkVirtues’ ThinkTank is comprised of dedicated educators, counselors, and doctors who have the recipe for raising and educating resilient, happy, confident children who become successful now and later in life. This work is based on the timeless virtues responsible for developing strong character. Through ThinkVirtues’ carefully crafted exercises and conversation starters, parents can have meaningful conversations and create a lasting bond with their children. ThinkVirtues helps parents help their children grow up to become productive adults who will make the right decisions, develop healthy relationships, and become their best selves. After all, no one else cares for your children more than you and with the guidance provided by ThinkVirtues, you can be sure that your children have all of the tools they need to navigate through life. The practice of ThinkVirtues’ exercises becomes a confidence-building surrogate for your maturing children when you are no longer there every minute of every day. Additionally, because of the lasting bond you will have created, your children will feel comfortable coming to you for help when unsure in a particular situation. No class, camp, or person can provide the love and care that you have for your own children – we at ThinkVirtues know that. At times you may need help regarding the teaching of morality, resilience, and life experiences but don’t always feel comfortable asking for it. ThinkVirtues’ guided lesson plans provide assistance that is easy to follow and understand. As a society, it is no longer possible to shelter children from the many bad examples they see outside of their homes, but with ThinkVirtues’ help, together we can ensure that they will learn to make the right decisions even when we are not there.

About ThinkVirtues

ThinkVirtues empowers children to be happy, confident and resilient! ThinkVirtues provides a complete set of tools, endorsed by experienced educators and child development specialists, so you can establish the right foundation in your child. Created for ages 4 to forever, children who’ve used ThinkVirtues are happier, more confident and resilient individuals who excel in the classroom, family, friendships and beyond! Just a few minutes a day prepares your child for the journey ahead. Learn more at www.ThinkVirtues.com.

Disclosure: This is a sponsored post on behalf of ThinkVirtues. All images are credited to ThinkVirtues.